What Kind of Sick Lottery have We Won?

No Surprises here! Pregnant again! My new OB/GYN has no worries about me not being "fertile". Again, we are closely monitored and this time I get to have a Maternal Fetal Medicine Specialist on hand too!

My first ultrasound does not go as planned. On the screen is an irregular shaped black hole with a white cloud inside. The ultrasound technician goes eerily silent and quickly gets another technician to take a look. Yes....I tend to draw crowds now when I go for appointments. They quietly discuss whether or not I have a molar pregnancy.....to which I state out loud, "YOU HAVE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME!". For those of you who do not know what a molar pregnancy is, it is not something you want to have.....EVER. Basically the cells grow out of control and instead of forming a cute baby, become a cancerous tumor that invades your body and eventually causes your organ systems to fail. Even after having a molar pregnancy removed, you may need to undergo chemotherapy. How do I know all of this? Well.....I have delved into an online underworld of pregnancy loss and have learned probably more than most specialists can share at this point (and they even agree with me on that fact). We are quickly ushered upstairs to meet with the MFM and OB. Both concur that although they do not believe it to be molar (PHEW), it is definitely not viable and there is again, no heartbeat detected. What appears to be a placenta is already atrophying and tearing away. Awesome. My body is scrambled, yet efficient. Again, another D&C for chromosomal testing, but the results were inconclusive. Now this time I end up with a fever, horrible stomach pains, a raging infection, and severe joint pain that requires prednisone for me to move at all.

I am sitting in my car one afternoon and the MFM gives me a call on my cell phone. He basically says that he has no idea what is possibly wrong with me. His only idea at this point is that I have an underlying autoimmune problem or undiagnosed blood clotting disorder. Both he and the OB send me to a different Rheumatologist to be re-evaluated. His current plan is that the next time I am pregnant....he is going to "Throw the Pharmacy at me". His words.

I meet with the new Rheumatologist. I even drag Kevin so that I can vouch for the fact that I am NOT a drug user or abuser of alcohol. 25 vials of blood later....and he isn't any closer than the original guy. The exception is that I seem to find one specialist that is more pompous than the last. He basically tells me that the recent issue to my joints was basically my body "over reacting". Yup....my body is a hypochondriac without me knowing about it. Kevin tries to tell this man that this has been going on for years and that I am not just whining about being a "little uncomfortable". He dismisses both of us and we go on our way into the land of pharmaceuticals.